Does God REALLY Love Me? 8 Signs You May Not Be Sure
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whosoever believes in him would not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16
Maybe you've heard that before.
Maybe, though, you wrestle with if it's actually true for you.
Sure, God loves the world - but me? Little ol' me? Insignificant me? Continuing-to-fall-in-sin me?
For some men, this struggle is very real! They believe that "God is love" and they recognize his loving kindness in their lives in many ways. But to genuinely believe that he not only knows you but loves you like he loves Jesus?
That's just too much for some of us to truly believe.
Here are 8 signs that this may be true for you and 2 ways to deal with this issue:
- You secretly don't like yourself or you struggle to know who you really are
- You're tormented by voices from your childhood
- You're constantly looking for (and desperate for) approval from others
- You're critical of others
- You struggle in most of your relationships with other people
- You are constantly driven and don't know why (or are too busy to recognize it)
- You have addictive tendencies
- You feel distance between you and God
Look at that list again.
Which ones do you resonate with the most? Now for the bigger question...
Why?
Take a second to let that question ruminate in your mind. Why is that true for you? What's really going on below the surface?
Do you put on a good face in front of people but deep inside you can't stand yourself?
Do you struggle to shake off the voices from your childhood that haunt you to this day? Voices of criticism, shame, anger, abuse?
Are you constantly needing someone to pat you on the back and tell you you're great, or okay, or worthy?
Do you find yourself critical of other people in your thoughts? Constantly judging what they do, what they think, what they say, or how you'd never do it like they do?
Are your relationships with people healthy or do you always seem to find yourself at odds with people and can't figure out why your relationships are so difficult to maintain or grow?
Have you ever stopped to consider why you're so driven to win at everything, accomplish something, build something, go somewhere new, or do something great?
Do you find yourself almost always on the verge of addiction? Maybe for you its porn, or praise from others, working out, busy work and constantly on the go, social media, food, or some other seeming "ok" thing?
How's your relationship with God....really? Do you enjoy him? Do you think he likes you (let alone loves you)?
How To Deal With These Questions
These are deep, hard questions that require thoughtful reflection but also something else. Two things, in fact.
1. Be honest with yourself.
Be honest about the questions that you're struggling with.
Be honest about the way you feel. This is tough for many of us men because we see introspection and wrestling with these things as signs of weakness. So instead of being honest we pretend. We pretend like we don't feel this way and we just push down our feelings and get them out of our way.
Yet, the pain and the questions, and the wrestling won't leave you. So, be honest with yourself.
As we're reminded in Romans 12:3: "...Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us”.
2. Be honest with God.
Be honest with God about the questions you're struggling with the most.
Turn to him and do something that's very scary for most of us: tell him the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth! So help you, God.
Seriously: What have you got to lose?? He already knows it all anyway. He knows you're hurting, wounded, frail, and.....dare I say, human! (gasp)
But it's ok and he's ok with your questions and concerns and fears and worries. Give them to him and be honest about it. Why?
Because he loves YOU! Yes, you. Right where you are - just like you are.
So do this today: "Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you." 1 Peter 5:7
