Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets: The Maturity Question

If you're a Christian man, you know that making good decisions is important. You want to live a life that honors God, serves your family well, and makes a positive impact in the world around you. But how can you make decisions that will lead you in that direction?  Not only that, but how can you make decisions on a day-to-day basis that lead you to a life with fewer regrets at the end?

Andy Stanley's book "Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets" offers some excellent guidance, and perhaps the most powerful tool in the book is what Stanley calls "the maturity question."

In this blog post, we'll explore what that question is, how it can help you make better decisions, and why it's particularly important for Christian men.

What is the Maturity Question?

The maturity question is simple but profound. It goes like this: "What does a mature person do in this situation?"

Andy suggests that we ask ourselves this question in any decision we face, whether big or small. The reason is that our default mode of decision-making is often driven by our desires, emotions, and fears. But if we pause and ask ourselves what a mature person would do, we tap into a higher standard and a wiser perspective. We're less likely to make impulsive or selfish decisions that we'll later regret.

Its just like when you ask yourself what Jesus would do.  It's calling upon a higher standard and takes you out of the mix for long enough to consider other options.  This is the power of the pause and it can help you make wiser and better decisions in every area of your life.

How can the Maturity Question help Christian men?

As Christian men, we're called to live in a way that reflects the character of Christ. We're called to love sacrificially, serve humbly, and pursue righteousness. But that's easier said than done, especially in a culture that values self-promotion, materialism, and sexual gratification (among other things).

The maturity question offers us a way to navigate those challenges. By asking ourselves what a mature person would do, we're forced to confront our own biases, blind spots, and weaknesses. We're reminded that life is not all about us, but about honoring God and loving others. And we're empowered to make choices that align with that goal.

Examples of how the Maturity Question works in real life.

The power of the maturity question comes in its simplicity and adaptability. You can apply it to any area of your life and any decision you face.

For example, when you're tempted to gossip about a colleague, you can ask yourself what a mature person would do. You might realize that a mature person would choose to speak words of encouragement or keep their mouth shut.

Or how about when you're struggling with resentment towards your spouse or someone at work?  You can ask yourself what a mature person would do and when you do, you might realize that a mature person would choose to forgive and seek reconciliation and not do the thing you're most likely to do without wisdom or maturity.

The key is to pause, reflect, and intentionally choose a more mature response.

Why the Maturity Question is particularly important for Christian men.

As Christian men, we have a responsibility to lead and live with integrity and wisdom. We're called to be examples of Christ-like love and servant leadership. But we can only do that if we're growing in maturity ourselves.

The maturity question is a powerful tool for that growth. It helps us to see beyond our own limited perspectives and desires. It challenges us to pursue a higher standard of behavior. And it invites us to trust in God's wisdom and guidance, rather than relying solely on our own impulses.

After all, “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?" (Jer 17:9).  

The maturity question is a simple but powerful tool that can help Christian men make better decisions and live with fewer regrets. By asking ourselves what a mature person would do, we tap into a higher standard and a wiser perspective. We're reminded that life is not all about us, but about honoring God and loving others. When we choose the path of wisdom and maturity, we're empowered to make choices that align with that goal.

As you face decisions in your own life, take a moment to ask yourself the maturity question. You might be surprised at the difference it can make.

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